Lingo-lovers Lose. A Cautionary Tale…

global

A quiet morning in St. Louis, MO, USA.


Your friendly neighborhood storytelling expert sits at his desk, peacefully interacting with some new connections on LinkedIn whenā€¦


ā€¦the alarm soundsā€¦


ā€¦The Lingo Alarm.


Hereā€™s the LinkedIn post that triggers itā€¦

(Our company) delivers expertise, market experience and a proven track record in bio-based composite manufacturing (masterbatch, extrusion and molding), supply chain and products. With Innovative patented bio-mass technologies and bio-plant based pigmentā€¦weā€¦can offer customers hemp and plant derived sustainable solutions as a drop-in eco-technology and bio-product replacement in a multiplicity of products and industrial platforms. Sequestering carbon and reducing a product or companies carbon footprint.

I read the postā€¦


ā€¦and then I read it againā€¦


ā€¦and then againā€¦


And I still have no idea what this company does.


(They lost me at ā€œbio-based composite manufacturingā€¦ā€)


Iā€™d been introduced to the guy who posted it so I ask him, ā€œWhoā€™s your target market?ā€ 


His reply: ā€œ…the target market is the planet.ā€ 


(Sigh! Not helpful!)


So I visit the companyā€™s website, searching for clues. 


And the alarm sounds again.


ā€œ(Our product) is a hemp biochar ā€“ recognized by the IPCC as a Negative Emission Technology (NET),ā€ the site proclaims.


(Sigh! Not helpful!)


I grab my dictionary and look up ā€œbiocharā€ 

biĀ·oĀ·char (/ĖˆbīōĖŒCHƤr/)
nouncharcoal produced from plant matter and stored in the soil as a means of removing carbon dioxide from the atmosphere.

(Now weā€™re getting somewhere)


I scroll down and find some coherent, lingo-free copy on the website:

For over 150 years, crude oil has been burned to create ‘carbon black’, the black pigment used in virtually everything from tires to shoes, fabrics to cosmetics, from inks to personal electronics. This crude and polluting process is still used to color and pigment billions of products because there isn’t a sustainable alternative…

…Until now.

Now weā€™re really getting somewhere)


And then at the very bottom of the page, in small print, I see:

ā€œWe are part of a shared global mission to drastically reduce greenhouse gas emissionsā€¦Whether you are a consumer, an investor or a manufacturer, we can make the world better together.ā€

Ding! Ding! Ding! Ding!


Thatā€™s the sound of a lingo-free, prospect-focused marketing statement. 

And (sigh!) itā€™s buried at the bottom of the web page.


Soā€¦after all that sleuthing, Iā€™m ready to translate that LinkedIn post: 


Environmentally conscious consumers and manufacturers choose (our company) to reduce carbon emissions that contribute to global warming. Our hemp-based products and patented technologies replace polluting, crude-oil-based manufacturing processes with clean solutions that help to save the planet. 


I wonā€™t rewrite the whole thing. But you get the idea. 


Simple lessons here: 


Drop the lingo. (If your audience needs a dictionary to decode your message, theyā€™ll tune out and move on.)


Know your target market (ā€œThe planetā€ is NOT a target market).


Focus on your prospects and WHY they should care (ā€œ…reduce their carbon footprintā€¦save the planet.ā€).


By the way, I know a manufacturer who implemented environmentally-friendly solutions not because he thinks heā€™s saving the planet, but because the government mandated it. 


ā€œWe can make the world better togetherā€ wonā€™t move this guy. 


Heā€™s all about cost-savings and efficiency. So thereā€™s a different story for him: Meet government mandates on time, with greater efficiency, and less cost. 


You have to know your prospects and the journey they wish to take if you want to get the story right. 

Don't go away yet..

p.s. Coaches, authors, and consultants hire me to power-up their creative content and storytelling to captivate prospects, stand-out and book more business.

Whenever you're ready, here are several ways I can help you become a storytelling stand-out so you'll land more clients without pitching and prodding:

1) Get theĀ Story Power Profit PackĀ -- 52 Strategies, Tips, and Tactics Ā to Transform Your Content from Ignored to Adored.

2) Watch theĀ free, 7-minute Micro-Training: ā€œThe 3 Most Important Storytelling Keys to Captivate Prospects and Inspire Them to Act -- Without Pitching and Prodding.ā€

3) Become a Story Power VIP: Master how to discover, assemble, and deliver business-building stories. Twice-monthly live masterclasses. Members-only content. One-on-one feedback and consulting sessions. And moreā€¦ If you'd like to learn more about our VIP program, just reply to this email and put "Story Power VIP" in the subject line. Iā€™ll contact you with more details.

4) Work with me one-on-one: If youā€™re interested in working directly with me -- to discover, assemble, and deliver powerful, business-building stories -- simply reply to this email and change the subject line to "Private Client." Tell me a little about yourself, your business, and what you'd like to accomplish, and I'll reply to discuss options.

5) Invite me to speak at an event: I can tailor a presentation that meets the specific needs of your organization. Informative. Entertaining. Virtual or live. Potential for continuing education credits when applicable for your group. If interested, reply to this email and change the subject line to ā€œSpeaking Engagement.ā€ Iā€™ll circle back to discuss the possibilities.

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Tom Ruwitch

Tom Ruwitch is the founder and CEO of Story Power Marketing. For more than 30 years, he has helped businesses grow by delivering powerful stories using a variety of different media.