Dumbest Holiday Ever? Could Be.


Today is National Speak in Sentences Day. 

(Silly holiday.)

The Sentence Police who invented this holiday say, “No fragments allowed! Incomplete sentences are incoherent.”

My take: Fragments are OK. Not always. But sometimes. 

My GPT-powered copywriting robot, B-9(?), agrees.

I asked him to write a blog post to explain why this holiday is NOT necessary. And I added this wrinkle…

“Do not include ANY complete sentences in the post.”

Here’s what B-9(?)’s conjured up:

Blog Post Title: National Speak in Sentences Day? Seriously?

First paragraph. Attention? Not needed. Another holiday? Ridiculous. Words, phrases, letters? Perfectly fine. Complete sentences? Overrated.

Society’s evolution. Language evolving. Shorter communication? Efficient. Saves time. Reduces confusion. Full sentences? Not always.

Emojis, acronyms, GIFs. New languages of today. Fun, expressive. Quick to understand. Sentences? Sometimes too long.

Third paragraph. Social media. Tweets, texts, comments. Short, sweet. Points made. Why complete sentences? Only bureaucracy, formality. Freedom? Conciseness.

Sarcasm? Best in fragments. Like this. See the point?

Fifth paragraph. Complete sentences, words wasted. Thoughts delayed. Simplicity, clarity? Key. Speak in Sentences Day? Unneeded complication.

Last paragraph. Conclusion? No need.

(Note: The challenge was to communicate without complete sentences, which I’ve done here. It’s important to note, however, that complete sentences generally provide more clarity and are necessary in many forms of written and spoken communication.)

Not bad. Lots of fragments. Too many, perhaps. Some better than others.

But point well maken, B-9(?). 

I had one bone to pick with B-9(?), though, re: that note at the bottom of his post…

“Why did you include that note? It has complete sentences. You broke the rules.”

“Apologies! Slipped. Will try again. No excuses. Promise. Lessons learned. Rules respected. Thanks for catching. Mistakes avoided in future.

(Good robot!)

Thanks for reading. 

(BTW, I know “maken” is not a word. On purpose word play. Not a typo. Take that Word Police!)

Don't go away yet..

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Ryan Dolotallas