Don’t Write Like This (Please)

I keep a swipe file of notable emails I receive — good and bad.

Ones that demonstrate the right way to do things.

Others that get things wrong.

Here’s one from the wrong-way file — a cold pitch I received a few years ago:

(Our magazine) has been an apex platform reaching out to 45,000 qualified subscribers in the U.S, offering a renewed aspect in understanding the latest innovations and technologies in the Education industry. Following a peer learning approach, (our magazine) spearheads in highlighting education industry’s latest trends and technologies, and brings forth the ideas and unique offerings of market leaders to assist education experts in establishing institutions alike.

I get stuff like this all the time.

Rotten, overwritten, lingo-laden copy litters emails, websites, social media posts, letters, brochures, broadcast advertisements and every other form of marketing content on earth.

AI hasn’t fixed this. It’s made it worse.

The people who write this stuff think phrases like “apex platform” or “renewed aspect in understanding” make them sound in-the-know or sophisticated.

Actually, they sound like blowhards.

I should know. I used to write that way until I learned better.

In the Story Power Profit Pack (Pointer #19), I offer the better way:

Ditch the Elephantine Big Words

I used to love big, fancy words — just because they were big and fancy. The bigger and fancier, the better.

I used my dictionary and thesaurus to find big, fancy words to replace small, simple words. Small and simple words are for small and simple people, I thought.

Smart and sophisticated people use big words.

I’m over that.

In marketing, smart people choose the RIGHT word. And the right word is often small and simple. Here’s why:

If you want to connect with your audience, your words must mean something to them. And if they need a dictionary to look up your big, fancy words, you won’t connect with them.

When you write, look out for big words. Get rid of ‘em — unless no other word will work.

Find a smaller, more familiar word. The small word paints the same picture, tells the same story. And because it’s a small word, more people understand the story. Fewer people will say “What the heck does that mean?!”

That’s the point. When you tell a story, you want it to connect.

The Profit Pack has 51 more pointers to help you create content that connects with prospects and turns them into clients. Grab a copy here.