Bad Examples

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Dude Checks Gas Leak With Match

By Tom Ruwitch

I ran across an article the other day about a dumb dude in Michigan who smelled gas coming from his newly installed water heater. He checked for the leak by lighting a match. He shoulda died, but he got off easy… …with singed eyebrows. Mixing fire and gas leak — that wasn’t his first mistake. …

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Ketchup and Hardcore Porn

By Tom Ruwitch

Did you hear the one about the ketchup bottle and the hardcore pornography site? Whoh! Settle down now. It’s not what you think. This is a G-rated story that is super-pertinent for anyone marketing a business. Turns out that the good folks at Heinz sold ketchup bottles in Germany that promoted a contest website. But…

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Groundhog Day

By Tom Ruwitch

I hope you had a joyous Groundhog Day! (It was last Tuesday, in case you missed it). Truth be told, I can live without the holiday. But I love the movie. Weatherman Phil Connor (Bill Murray) wakes each morning in Punxsutawney, PA for a Groundhog Day do-over.  On each of these days, Phil runs into an…

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Dump the Grammar Guide

By Tom Ruwitch

Back in high school I had a basketball coach who didn’t win any spelling bees or grammar contests. Once, after we failed to run the play he called during practice, he stormed onto the court, screaming: “Jeez, yous guys! Don’t you know the American language!?” Smart-ass kids that we were, we used to mock Coach…

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Fastest Surgeon

By Tom Ruwitch

I’m not a surgeon. And I don’t play one on TV. But I know this much: If you’re operating on ONE patient, and THREE people die, you’ve botched the job. That really happened — to Dr. Robert Liston, who was famous in the 19th century for being the fastest surgeon around. In those days, before…

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